ORD LO! - and the journey to get here

Adapted from my Facebook post:

Everyone seems to write an ORD entry to mark their journey through that institution called NS... I'. The memory is still crystal clear. 28 April 2010. The day my 1 year and 10 month journey through that rite called NS. It was with much anxiety and trepidation that I boarded the ferry to that island known as Pulau Tekong, where I would spend the first 9 weeks of NS in something called BMT.

Somehow it wasn't that bad with the big W for whiskey (and welfare) helping and before I knew it 9 weeks had passed without me even knowing who everyone was in my platoon. My sect comd was nice (I still rmb you! B S Tan), even though he and I hardly talked lol. And my PS was much nicer than any subsequent PS I have had :P POP felt like the top of the world, but little did I suspect that it was just the beginning of much sai kang. Getting my posting was probably the worst thing of 2010. I had little inkling wad RFN(T) meant, but I knew at least, that 1 SIR was an infantry battalion. And who makes up the bulk of infantry? Thats right!!! RIFLEMAN FTW /facepalm

First day at Mandai Hill Camp. Waking up at 6am to catch the taxi....Can anywhere be more ulu?! Served by only one bus, and made famous by Dave Teo, this was where I was going to spend the remainder of my NS life. Dragging my duffel bag into the MPH, I was placed in 'Alpha company'. Somehow the only consolation was that Song Yu from my sec sch days was in the same battalion, but different coy. The CO and OC appeared to be oddballs, totally at odds with my BMT experience. I have never met an OC who likes to go 可以吗？as his catchphrase and was so damn uh weird -.-  Advanced infantry training seriously sucked. It was like BMT all over again with some new tricks such as matador and river crossing... etc

I remember crying much for the first few months at Mandie Hell. I really thought unit life would be slacker. But anyway, when life gives u lemons, you make life take the lemons back! Long story short, I started my quest to downpes, but they all failed miserably. Then somehow a stroke of another's misfortune helped me to downpes and so started my vocation as a clerk/storeman. Still, I went through half a year of AIT, YOG, Brunei, Ex Maju Bersama. The second year seemed to be getting easier. Then tragedy struck my family. Anyway, I managed to somehow get over it and pulled through the remainder towards ORD.

Now  that the journey is over, I wonder what lies in store now. NS was predictable and regimental. The sudden freedom is quite new and interesting. Uni - here I come!

It's been a year into 2012 and while I think the world will not end this year, mine nearly did. Well it's a long story what happened, but more on that later. I would have liked to believe that generally, I am someone who means what I say and say what I mean. Even if sometimes it may be hard to do so. The keyword however, is 'generally'.

2011 has been a mixed year. It gave me pain, sorrow, depression but also fun, excitement, joy. It gave me new memories, experiences and friends. Especially close ones. Well, the incident in question was a result of mixed expectations, poor judgment and bad communication that had painful consequences. While I'm glad its over, I have learnt alot about trust, honesty and truthfulness.

Looking ahead, I don't care what others say about 2012 being a doomsday year. Life has just started again for me and I intend to make the best out of my uni years and pursue my interests. Carpe diem!!

It seems that every new year I feel compelled to write a New Year's entry, to reflect on the past year and to set the tone for year ahead. Last year was a really trying period for me and my family. I'm sure I don't have to go into the painful details. But it was also a time that I grew and learnt from all the lessons that life was trying to teach. It wasnt all that bad either. I was involved in NDP 2011, gt revocated and managed to gain a very good friend.

Its hard to believe that so much can happen in 365 days and that it really seems like yesterday that I was dreading going to brunei for ex lancer. Already its 2012, with 56 days left to ORD and uni life starting in 8 months time. And somehow my unit thinks its a good idea to send me for storeman course. Not that I'm complaining about the course itself, but I dun really see the point when there's so little time left lol. Its quite fun to learn new stuff abt logistics and stores and the course conductor is really nice haha. But Sembawang camp is just a little inacessible (but better then mandai) and its quite a welcome change from the stupid sai kang and chionging that is 1 SIR.

Haiz i have to finish up on my NUS scholarship essay soon....... this year is going to be quite a strain on my finances ugh. And with the stupid economy in doldrums I doubt I will be getting any money from the government lol.

A Guide To Remaining Entertained While Being Cooped Up At Home

Dang. So its been like 2.5 weeks since I last went out. Been at home all along still recovering from the op. It's been healing ok, and I've been off antibiotics already, so it sjus a matter of when I can remove the splint and elastics. Anyway since I'm so bored and I'm feeling nice...... haha I shall share what I do to remain entertained..

Guidelines to remaining entertained (so you won't be bored duh)

1. Most important of all: DO Stuff! (If you're doing something you won't be bored because you have something to do right? LOL! No brainer actually)

So...I guess the next question to answer will be. BUT WHATS THERE TO DO???

• Play games? PC/Console/Board/Card It doesnt really matter. Personally I play TF2 and dota
• Read! Since you have so much time, might as well read a few books to gain extra knowledge and improve your literary skills right? Newspapers too! Now you can read every single article and find out so much more!!!
• Write. Update your blogs! Write a story! Or be like me! (and write a guide. haha)
• Get friends to visit! A very good way to kill time, catch up with your friends and be entertained all at one go :P But NS is a huge downer since alot of my friends are cooped up themselves in camp -_-
• Handicrafts? A bit childish. But hey... it occupies ur hands. haha It could be interesting for all you know. Like this cool video I found about DIY candy
• Watch tv. Another brainless activity. But if you have cable, theres lots of interesting programmes and documentaries on Nat Geo/Discovery etc. Just dun spend so long hogging the tv and straining your eyes
• Study. For nerds who have nothing really better to do and those who have no choice bwahaha

2. Go out (If possible)

Of course this is conditional on the state of your physical state and it doesnt really count as being cooped up... but meh. just once in a while its nice to do so.

• There are so many things to see in Singapore actually. Parks, museums, trails. etc... Now is the Christmas season and I really wanna go out and see the lights, sights and sounds. (And buy a few presents)
• Or since this is really for those who cant travel.... go downstairs. Get some fresh air. Look at all the little things in your neighbourhood. Who knows? Maybe you'll find something new!

3. Rest

Well I guess you are cooped up in the first place cos you're sick or recovering.  So this has the double effect of making you better faster and killing time! And time spent unconscious goes by reallyyy quickly ^^


Hmm ok I think that should be about it. Any other suggestions?

I wonder now in the age of facebook, twitter and instant status updates, do people still bother to blog? Most of the people who I know to have personal blogs seemed to have stopped updating. Well, I'm no exception myself but on this occasion I decided to make an update since I really have nothing to do.

I've just undergone a "Maxillary lefort 1 advancement, mandibular hofer segmental osteotomy setback and autogenous bone augmentation at maxilla" operation which in layman's terms means I went and fixed my underbite ._.  Time will tell if its worth it but for now I'm paying the price for it by not being able to eat and talk. Its been 5 days without solid food and not being able to make a single coherent sound other than grunts and other animalistic noises :\ Anyway the good thing is that its give me mc till 19 Dec for now. Which means of course that I don't have to be in camp heh. Only 92 days to go anw!!! Unlike some ppl who are going to ORD nex fri :(

Through this op I also have seen how caring people around me are and how blessed I am with good friends and relations. I hope mum is happy.

Updates

Well well. It appears much has happened in half a year. I havn't really elaborated on what has been going on so I guess now will be a good time to clear the air since time is somewhat on my side.

Basically the main few events:
1. Mum has left for heaven. (More on that later)
2. NDP (pictures are in fb, do check them out)
3. 190 days to ORD

I don't think I have mentioned this before, but mummy was diagnosed with stage IV leiomyosarcoma in 2009. Which obviously isn't good news. Throughout her diagnosis, treatment and passing, she has never once blamed anyone and was even then, a pillar of my support.It was thus a huge blow when God decided to take her home. I found it quite hard to cope initially, after all that I have been through. And I will always be glad for the 2 years that she was given (and had asked for). We have grown stronger, more independent and more resilient. Perhaps it was also for the best, as she was in deep pain caused by that lump of cells furiously dividing in her liver, uterus and lung. Anyway, I'm glad that she is now in paradise, reunited with her mother and cannot wait till we all meet again.

Next, I didn't know that I was going to be involved in NDP till around Apr. It was really hard work, burning numerous weekends, weekdays and energy trying to move all the props and ensure a smooth running of the show. I know that there was lots of controversy and criticism, a lá the funpack song. Sure, some parts may be a bit cheesy, but there's no need to be so critical. Its a time when Singaporeans get to come together and celebrate the hard work that we have put into making our nation an envy in the region and the world. I cant say that it was a bed of roses,  but the process was definitely worth it. I wished that my mother could have watched it, and it was extremely poignant when they showed the character of 'Mother' in the show passing away. In any case, I have met new friends, new ppl who have shown me that life is not all that bad and that whats most important are the choices we make and hw we choose to utilise our life.

With about 190 days to go before ORD, I hope that uni life will start on a good note and that whatever memories that I have accumulated over my ns life, good and bad teach me never to take things for granted and the importance of having a positive outlook. I will admit it here, I have once fallen into depression and it is not a pleasant experience. Do talk with friends and family. They're the pillars of life.

Funny that my first post of 2011 should be in march. Well watever. As of now, there is <34x days to ORD. And I'm really happy now that this >>>
has happened. This is why I'm able to post this now instead of being stuck in camp rotting away. Sian TTM though, this coming Sat gt guard duty.


Really can't wait for Uni to begin!!!! And I'm really looking forward to my bday.

2010 is ending. It has brought many memories. Some joyous, other much more painful. Dun really want to go into details, but I'm quite glad to see the back of 2010. Still, the first thing that 2011 is going to bring me is a stupid overseas ex to brunei. argh!

Probably those that know me may understand what has been going on this year and it has been quite tough on me. There were nasty ppl, but at least there were ppl who supported and backed me up, and I'm thankful for that. I've asked why I had to go through what I had gone through many, many times. But there's no satisfactory answer. I'm just hoping, one day when I look back, there will be some silver lining in it. But for now, jus wanna get brunei over and done with. Sian.

My 80th post. Things have been the same. I still hate 2010. Everyday I feel dam sian and depressed. Its so hard to keep up a sense of normality. I hate this! So many things are bothering me and they are forever on my mind. I can safely say 2010 is not my year at all.

I've been praying so hard but nothing seems to have changed. "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence not seen." Easier said then done as I have found out. "My grace is sufficient for thee.." this is more encouraging but I need to last another 532 days. I just feel so much pain everyday. Someone help me please!

Oh well, at least YOG has been a much needed reprieve but other than that I have nothing much to look forward to except more outfields/range/route marches/ overseas excercises. Somehow I need and will get out of all this. Mum and dad's birthdays were just over. I don't really know what else to write. So much for my 80th post.

Tomorrow is the opening ceremony of the inaugural Youth Olympic Games and apparently, 90% of singaporeans are not interested in the least. Well, i saw an articles in the Straits Times today regarding the $hi++y food they are serving to volunteers and I must say, the person who posted the photos has guts! I like that and I can really relate to that, SFI really serves quite sucky food. http://www.temasekreview.com/2010/08/13/online-pressure-forces-sfi-to-improve-dog-food-for-yog-volunteers/

Oh well at least this week they changed caterers all of a sudden to ISS. Their food at least looks and tastes normal.

I'm actually very thankful for the YOG since it gives me opportunities to stay out of camp. Although its quite tiring, but its still better than the life or rather, no-life that we have in camp. We shall see how the opening ceremony goes tmr.



p.s: this quote made me laugh : "a full-time NS man activated to volunteer at the YOG floating platform"

spot the oxymoron

Being in my new infantry unit is really depressing every single day. That's when these verses start speaking to me.


This poor man cried, and the LORD heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles. Psalm 34:6


Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” Luke 12:6-7 

Hope I can get a medical review soon. My eczema keeps flaring up now due to the heat and sweat which makes it super hard to do anything =( Till then. jia you. Looking forward to ORD. Every day passed is one day nearer!

Haix, I'm only updating this 2 weeks after BMT POP. What's with army and their legendary love of acronyms. Anyway, I've been posted to a dumping ground. Shall not reveal the camp or unit but suffice to say, I'm a rifleman a.k.a human shield. Basically I'm supposed to run up and down hills carrying whatever stupid weapon I'm assigned and basically be the first to die in the event of an artillery strike or when encountering a tank.

The camp kinda sucks, food is a step down from tekong and welfare is practically non-existent. I heard other units get internet access but I have no such luck. Other restrictions in place include no mp3/media players, no food to be brought in and no use of vending machines. Free time is also a totally alien concept at the camp. Really hate my life. I thought things would improve after BMT. The training is pretty standard, but I'm dreading all the outfields, SOC, route marches which I have had enough of during BMT. Barely survived all these and now I'm expected to continue for another 19 months. Crap.

The Advanced Infantry Training or AIT lasts 6 weeks and its basically section training where we have to learn to fight as a team of 7. Fortunately it's interrupted by the youth olympic games so we get plenty of time out of camp doing grunt work at the marina bay. Oh well it's still better than in-camp. I'm really miserable and depressed everytime I'm in camp which makes every moment out so much more to be desired and enjoyed. Really, if you find your current life boring and wished for excitement, go join the army. It really teaches you how to enjoy life's simplest pleasures. A cup of cool water after tough PT. Clouds that obscure the sun and the cool breeze. The list goes on.

Anyway I have just put in braces on my teeth and have a follow up appt in 6 weeks time. My teeth kinda hurt now and I'm wondering how to go outfield this tues to practice section drills. Hope there's no route march and it ends fast.

This new blog template looks so much cooler =D. Oh man, I can't describe how cool the feeling of freedom is, after 9 weeks of doing stuff that I don't even want to do, having 1 week off is simply the best thing that could ever happen.

POP for 02/10 enhanced leadership batch W coy, sch 3 was quite a simple affair. Had the 20km route march super early, around 5+. It rained intermittently between 4km stretches which rocked as there was not enough time to complete the whole 24km so we got a 4km discount. Furthermore, the whole march was on road, which made it easier somewhat. Had 2 abrasions by the end of the whole thing and wanted to die by 12-16km so I'm super glad we had it easy. The whole parade started around 3.50pm and the first half was quite uneventful, although I felt quite stupid doing the infantry song and roar. But who cares, I'm free from tekong!!!! Well here are the pictures:

Whiskey coy, whiskey coy, whiskey coy, we are the best, we are the champion, and we will always be the one, whiskey coy!

My buddy throughout the whole 9 weeks.

1 last look at my bunk. Its the left-most one with the red sloping roof. Good riddance!

Feeling quite high now as its the start of the week, but posting is coming out on friday. Kinda worried as I was shortlisted for armor recce trooper which involves carrying dam heavy loads and marching for super long distances in small groups. Also IPPT silver is a must to pass out. How to when I can't even pass BMT IPPT. Anyway, I'm praying and hoping for a non-combat vocation. Call me whatever you want but that's what I feel suits me best. I don't think I am able to shoot at someone to kill him in a real war anyway.

Now I'm at the middle of BMT. Field camp is now over and up next is SIT test. I'm not going to really bother too much about it as its a selection tool for command school. I just want a non-combat vocation where I can do better than just going outfield. Honestly, I have no interest in and am not fit at all fighting frontline. Field camp sucked but at least its over. I just calculated that there is about 2 full weeks of training left. Really looking forward to POP-ing.

Feeling kinda moody as its bookin day and I can only come out 7 days later. That sucks but at least it means the following week is only 4 days long. Maybe 3 if SDC visit is on that week. I just hate route marches mostly.

And about the recent controversy about City Harvest Church's donation collection methods. I feel that they are misleading people when they say that giving donations to the church results in greater results. What makes it different from an investment scheme? God wants us to give out of our love for him as everything belongs to him in the first place. If we expect rewards for our offering we are no different from money grubbing scum. Does he even need our money in the first place? God does not want us to be rich on this earth as our treasures are laid up above in heaven. This world is not our home. If we happen to be rich it is a blessing, not an entitlement. Mega churches are really enticing people with the prosperity gospel and it makes me sad when people fall for it. Are they really saved? I hope so.

Back to the topic of NS. I really feel encouraged by the grace of God. Truly I wouldn't have made it through field camp and 5 weeks of NS BMT if it were not for God's mercy and grace. What a friend we have in Jesus!

Well, its been 4.5 weeks since enlistment. Have more or less adjusted. Whiskey has been better then I expected. I mean, at least its not Raven or Ninja. Still, we had ~3 sort of severe punishments for things such as being late or bunk dirty. Anyhow, the halfway point of BMT is coming. And that's field camp. For 5 nights outfield, we'll be doing loads of crap. Don't exactly wanna think about it and ruin my long vesak day weekend. But God has been quite good to me. I've been emo-ing for my first 3 weeks there over the lost of my freedom and all the crap I had to do. Mostly got over it but it still sux every time there's training and I cant keep up, esp route marches.

Poor ppl got confinement and guard duty this week. Really pity them. But that's army for you. Which is why care for soldiers is last on their core values. Hope I can survive next week. Ppl having their field camp this week were dam lucky. 4 days only and it didnt rain at all! Oh well, I heard if ppl faint they *will* be nicer but since my batch are all silver NAPFA and above, I don't really think that will happen. Am going to pray that nothing bad happens and we all can deal with the stuff they throw at us.

Sigh, with about 17 hours to go before going to tekong, feeling uber sian-ed. Only thing to look forward to is this sat labour day. Incidentally, tmr is exactly 19 years and 1 month since my birth.

The gov so good to me, giving me new haircut, new home, new friends, new clothes and free meals with allowance sommore! Which other gov so good? But then, every year make you come back for training, while other foreigners are faster, cheaper and better and can work more productively! Song bohs? Rly sux man.

Anw, I've gotten two offers so far, 1 from NTU and 1 from NUS. Now gotta really think dip dip as to which course to accept. NUS more prestigious, but more competitive, and its not guaranteed you will get your choice of modules. Hostel and residences also so hard to get. But at least its nearer than NTU. On the other hand, NTU seems more relaxed, has a somewhat newer campus and its 4 years direct honours course. Really confusing leh.

Been working for 2 weeks alr. And I've been thinking heavily about life these few months. After nearly dying, it really changes one's perspective. And right now, my take is that I'm wasting my time. While I have 25 more days to enlistment, I think at least in NS, I will be learning something. While my work now is not stressful or tiring, it is boring. I feel no sense of accomplishment or achievement at all.

While the pay is decent, ($6/hr) the ppl working here are mostly older than me and seem to have held the job for quite some time. I can't see myself doing it on a long term basis. And its only been 2 weeks! No wonder Shu Ning quit after 1.5 mnths or so. Im counting down everyday to the last day of work and as of now its 20 days, with 14 days of work remaining. Another thing is if I had went in on my original enlistment date, I would be having my POP soon. Haiz

Today is yet another boring day. Ytd was Good Friday and there was nothing to do. Today I wanted to go to the pixar exhibition and someone ruined my plans by saying he was sick, there will be many people there etc. WTH la. It was something I've been looking forward to all week after being transferred to another department which I don't really like. Then I get this kind of crap.


LIFE SUCKS. FML

How does it feel to be 19? Nothing extraordinary for sure. Today seemed like any other Sunday, except that the date was 28 march. This means that 19 years ago on this same day, I was thrust into this world. So far it doesnt seem that special though. I don't feel particularly happy or sad. Just thankful that I made it this far, since I almost died last month. I have much to be thankful for actually and this proves that God does take care of his own.

So maybe I already have everything I need, as I have received the greatest present I can ever receive from God, his love, mercy and salvation. Praise God.

YAY! Another major milestone in life over. I'm talking about A level results which came out on 5 Mar. Strangely I didn't feel as elated/anxious over this as I did for my O' levels 2 years ago. Except maybe for some heart-pounding here and there. In any case, my results were seriously run of the mill. Could have done better, but I'm already thankful it wasn't much worse then I feared. 78.75 rank points I hope can get me into faculty of Science @ NUS hopefully. I heard of people with (much) worse results than me so maybe I should be counting my blesssings. Still, a string of B's don't really look that impressive... especially that darned C for H1 Geog. Overall 22/08 did quite well as a class I suppose although the IP classes (naturally) did better.

On a brighter note, I already got upgraded to PES B (again) 11 days before my scheduled appointment on 24 Mar but they moved it to 15 Mar so I hope they send the enlistment letter for April intake soon.

Argh! Friggin pissed with the whole stupid way CMPB and by extension, MINDEF do things.

The story?? Here:

So after the fantastic events of 4 feb and taking painful long time to recuperate, I felt much better. So went to get the memo/letter from my doctor at the ENT centre, SGH. And thought this meant that I was well enough for enlistment. Then I went down to CMPB hoping to get an upgrade on my PES. Waited super long there and guess what? Stupid MO says he got to see me in 1 month again and refuse to upgrade me. WTH la. And all because of this one line in the memo: "He should refrain from strenuous exercise for 1 month." So the MO thought it means I'm not fit for enlistment and want me to wait 1 month, till 24 Mar. Stupid because the next enlistment is in april which is 2 months away!!! By that time I will fit already so why can't my PES be upgraded?! NO WAI!!!! This probably means I won't be scheduled in time for april enlistment. Which means more wasting time at home and finishing NS even later. And going in with all the poly, ITE ppl. No offence to these ppl but I will feel dam left out. Sianz!

Now the only thing is to get a new memo from my doctor and make him say I'm fit for enlistment. Hopefully then the MO will upgrade my PES and schedule enlistment in time for april. Otherwise I hope they can still get me a place in april in 1 months time. ARGHHHHHH


And doomsday is now just 6 days away XD.